The Social Reality of Feeling Lonely

Loneliness has been defined as a dissatisfaction with one's social relationships. It is not clear, however, if loneliness is associated with having fewer close friends or fewer friends in general. Furthermore, this loneliness may be expressed either as a lack of relationships or as a lack of closeness in relationships. Finally, the lack of intimacy may be perceived only by the lonely person and may not reflect how the relationship appears to the partner. A total of 22 female and 20 male freshmen filled out a loneliness scale and social network questionnaire. Friends of the female subjects were also asked to fill out the social network questionnaire. Lonely persons listed as many best friends as nonlonely persons and were equally likely to have this choice reciprocated. Lonely subjects, however, did perceive a significantly lower level of intimacy in these relationship than did nonlonely subjects, and their "best friends" validated this perception. Lonely subjects did not differ in the number of friends in general that they listed, but their "friends" were significantly less likely to return this friendship choice.