The Muslim Marriage Rejuvenation Retreat: Putting Iḥsān Back into Muslim Marriages

Our StoryThe idea of The Muslim Marriage Rejuvenation Retreat was born out of the multiple divorces we were witnessing within our family and the communities we served.We were often privy to the intimate details and found that no significant efforts were being made to proactively preserve and work through the couple's marital difficulties.Maybe they attended a couple of therapy sessions or participated in a family intervention.But it often appeared that these interventions were half-hearted attempts toward reconciliation with poor follow-up and ignoring deeper-seated issues.Some marriages seemed to be passing through a slow withering of the spouses' initial love for one another, whereas in others communication seemed to have been poor from day one.We were often asked to intervene, but, more often than not, it was after one or both of the spouses had already checked out emotionally.The request to intervene was often stated informallysomeone sharing their marital difficulties after we had delivered a lecture, brief discussions over the phone, and the like.In essence, these were far from ideal formats to help couples work through their marital difficulties.We recognize that marriages do not just suddenly end due to some acute issue; rather, quite often a gradual degeneration of communication, love, and tenderness unfolds over many years.Because of this complexity, we have always advised marital therapy and hesitated to devise quick-fix, rapid-solution methodseven though we were often asked to do so.We gradually came to realize that many couples hesitate to engage in therapy, have tried it but found it ineffective, that the therapist's style only appealed to one of the spouses, or they only wanted to engage with the religious leadership despite often needing more than just religious counseling.To avoid the attached stigma, we determined that a proactive, psycho-educational approach rooted in Islam would be most appropriate in addressing this widespread reality.Alhamdulillah, the Muslim community contains many proficient therapists who work with Muslim couples on an individual basis.However, very few organized efforts are tailored to teach couples the appropriate skills, tools, and best marital practices in a group setting.We wanted to work with couples at all phases of their marriagefrom those who do not