Intimacy, Conversational Patterns, and Concomitant Cognitive/Emotional Processes in Couples

This study relates the conversational behavior of 30 couples to their level of intimacy, perception of their interaction, and affect about it. Each couple discussed a problem for 10 minutes in a social psychology laboratory, during which vocal measures were computer-recorded. They completed a problem inventory and the Personal Assessment of Intimacy in Relationships (PAIR) inventory, which yields six intimacy scores, and independently rated their affective reaction to and answered questions about their interaction during an audiotape playback. Positive affect was associated with faster cycles of alternating in talking and with increased emotional intimacy. Partners were similar to one another in switching pauses and interruptions. The difference between partners in intimacy was more important than level of intimacy in predicting other variables. Men felt less sexual intimacy than women did but valued it more. Women were happier when they felt emotionally intimate. Greater age and length of relationship was negatively correlated with subjective intimacy but positively correlated with smoothness in interaction.