Telling the Secret

A questionnaire survey of 755 adults sexually abused as children, asking about the circumstances of their disclosure to the first person they told, resulted in 286 responses of which 228 were from female victims of incest. Individuals were asked basic demographic information, details about their abuse, who they first told, the reaction of the first person told, and reasons why they delayed telling or finally did tell. The women in this sample told in three groups. Those telling their parents first were likely to tell in childhood. A second group telling friends, other family members, or partners were more likely to tell in early adulthood. A third group, those telling therapists, revealed the abuse at a later age. Those revealing the incest to parents in childhood received a worse reaction than did those waiting until adulthood. When women disclosed to parents prior to age 18, the incest continued for more than a year after the disclosure in 51.9% of the cases. The women in this sample who disclosed as children were likely to be met with disbelief or blame rather than with support, validation, and protection.