An Eccentric and Dialogic Autoethnography of Two Language Teacher Educators as an Extension of Self-Study Paradigm

In this rather eccentric manuscript, we invite you into our ongoing dialogue, which is a shared journey where we approach autoethnography as more than a method. It is a way of knowledging through conversation for us, two language teacher educators. Throughout, we reflect on how critical autoethnographic narrative allows us to voice our vulnerabilities, map our identities, and challenge the taken-for-granted norms and practices in language teacher education. Together, we meander through retro/intro/pro/spective reflections, blending theory with storytelling; mind with heart; English with occasional Turkish expressions; past, present, and future. We embrace autoethnography not only to understand who we are and how we got here as language teacher educators, but also to co-create spaces of healing, resistance, and transformation. Along the way, we question colonizing research practices, recognize affective turn and critical paradigm in the field, and make room for emotions, discomfort, and laughter. This piece is not a conclusion—it is a continuation. We speak, write, and remember loudly hoping that our readers/companions will not just act as onlookers, but participate in our dialogue in this being, becoming, knowing, and writing experience.