The Rules of Friendship

This paper presents the findings of four studies on the rules of friendship. Studies I and 11 established the strength of endorsement of 43 friendship rules in British, Italian, Hong Kong and Japanese samples. Study Ill found differences in reported rule-keeping between sustained and lapsed friendships by self and other, and between sustained relationships rated high and low in quality. Study IV examined the role of rule breaking in friendship breakdown, and dissolution of friendship was attributed to the breaking of a number of our endorsed rules. Six rules were endorsed as very important in Study I and distinguished between behaviour in lapsed and current friendships; also relationship breakdown was related to failure to keep to these rules. They dealt mainly with the exchange of rewards and intimacy. Dissolution of friendships was also attributed to the breaking of third party rules.