Self-Expansion Activities with a Partner as One Path to Well-Being

The self-expansion model has generated hundreds of studies on the benefits of relationships for the self, but few have explicitly made the link from relationship quality to well-being. In this article we focus on how doing self-expanding activities with a romantic partner can enhance relationship quality and, in turn, enhance well-being. First, we review the basic model; then, we present a section on the overall well-being benefits of strengthening relationships; then, we go through the various areas of study of self-expansion for couples highlighting for each the studies that show not just greater marital satisfaction, but the effect on various specific well-being effects. After one develops a relationship, one becomes accustomed to this self-expansion through including the partner into the self. As a result, the excitement of this inclusion slows over time, and thus relationships can become dull. But we argue that a major way to reinvigorate relationships is by doing novel and challenging (self-expanding) activities together with one’s partner, so that the self-expansion becomes associated with the relationship. We then briefly review many studies (experiments, daily diary, and others) supporting this principle: shared self-expanding activities increase relationship quality. Finally, we briefly discuss research showing that enhancing relationship quality increases well-being. This emphasis on well-being is important because it can help researchers understand the mechanisms behind how a specific form of improving relationships contributes to well-being.