This article is devoted to the question of why one person, after a crisis, becomes more resilient, understands oneself more accurately, and organizes one’s life more successfully, whereas another becomes stuck in anxiety, defensiveness, dependence on evaluation, and repetition of former patterns. At the center of the study is the concept of distinguishability, understood as a person’s capacity to clearly understand what is happening to them, who they are in a difficult situation, where their boundaries lie, what exactly they are feeling, and how they can act. It is shown that distinguishability is precisely what creates an inner support, helps transform life events into experience, and serves as the foundation of psychological maturity. The article reveals the connection between the loss of distinguishability, self-conservation, and crisis. Self-conservation is understood as a state in which a person clings to an image of oneself as already complete, correct, and finished. Within this logic, error, criticism, vulnerability, and the need to change are experienced as threat, while the main forces are directed toward control, defense, aggression, avoidance, and the search for external confirmation. On this basis, crisis is described as the moment at which former ways of holding oneself together exhaust their resource, while new ways of understanding and acting are only beginning to take shape. The article shows under what conditions crisis leads to internal reorganization, growth in maturity, and expansion of distinguishability, and under what conditions it leads instead to the intensification of self-conservation. Particular attention is given to practical signs of the growth of distinguishability: greater clarity in relation to oneself, better tolerance of tension, more precise boundaries, an expanded behavioral repertoire, and more mature relationship-building. In its concluding part, the work proposes a coherent processual model of the connection between distinguishability, self-conservation, crisis, and psychological maturity.
Alena Petina (2026) studied this question.
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