"I'll Do Whatever She's Comfortable With": Staging Theatrical Intimacy While Navigating Gender, Power, and Emotional Labor

Abstract: As intimacy professionals are increasingly working in theatrical spaces, power dynamics have begun to shift between the intimacy professional, the actors involved in the intimacy, and members of the production team. Throughout this process, however, well-intentioned actors can shift the power dynamics and emotional labor of theatrical intimacy work that, in turn, reinforces gender roles. This shift often happens with the utterance of the phrase "I'll do whatever she's comfortable with," when used in theatrical intimacy staging practice. By using this phrase that has been uttered in many intimacy rehearsals I have facilitated, I will challenge the good intentions of this phrase, complicate the emotional labor that this (im)balance of power then necessitates and offer strategies for intimacy professionals to rebalance the rehearsal space and offer alternatives for affirming and honoring boundaries.