Telling children their ill parent is dying: a study of the factors influencing the well parent

This study explores the issues and difficulties that influenced surviving parents when they were faced with telling their children that their ill parent would die. In-depth semi-structured interviews were carried out with nine participants who had been through this experience. Thematic analysis was used to highlight the internal experience within the well parent, in relation to the dying parent and to their children. Participants' experiences were shown to be inherently related to holding paradox, specifically in terms of their own conflicting needs and conflicting needs within the family. The importance of following the lead of the dying parents and the implications of this for therapeutic practice are considered.