Adult attachment and emotional control

Abstract The connection between attachment style and affect regulation, proposed by attachment theorists, was explored in the context of long‐term dating relationships. Seventy‐two couples completed questionnaire measures of attachment (using a four‐group forced‐choice item, together with scales tapping Comfort with closeness, and Anxiety over relationships) and emotional control (in which subjects rated own and partner's control of anger, sadness, and anxiety, and the extent to which partners wanted them to control these emotions). Couples in which both partners endorsed insecure attachment styles (using the forced‐choice measure) reported greater emotional control than did couples with two secure partners. Data from the attachment scales also supported the link between insecure attachment and emotional control: Comfort with closeness was negatively related both to one's own emotional control and to perceptions that partners wanted subjects to control their sadness; Anxiety over relationships was associated with perceptions that partners controlled sadness and wanted subjects to control their anger and sadness. The link between insecure attachment and the control of negative emotion remained significant when the frequency of experiencing such emotion was controlled. The association between attachment dimensions and other responses to negative emotions was also explored, and was consistent with attachment theory.