Embodied Risk and Uneven Protection: A Queer Autoethnography of Development Work in Malawi

As a trans/non-binary academic navigating the complexities of international development work, my positionality is both a source of privilege and vulnerability. This article offers a queer autoethnographic reflection on a professional engagement activity in Malawi, a country where LGBTIQ+ identities are criminalised and heavily stigmatised, which required me to confront the tensions between my identity and the sociopolitical landscape I was working within. This reflection examines how these tensions shaped my experiences of international travel, identity negotiation, and perceptions of safety as a trans/non-binary researcher in a context of systemic barriers and inequalities. By intertwining personal narrative with broader considerations of development practice, the article situates embodied experience within broader legal, social, and geopolitical structures, foregrounding how gender-diverse identities intersect with colonial and professional power relations. In doing so, it contributes to debates on reflexivity, ethics, and institutional responsibility in development research and practice, while critically engaging with local forms of resistance without reproducing homonationalist narratives.