Making Friends in Cyberspace

From its birth as a way of linking a few university and defense laboratories in the late 1960s, the Internet has grown into a global network connecting between 30 and 40 million people (Elmer-Dewitt, 1995). Social linkages in the form of E-mail and discussion groups appeared in the first days of the Internet and have grown explosively ever since. Today there are over 5,000 Internet discussion groups (Hahn Williams Berry, 1993; Heim, 1992; Stoll, 1995). On the other side are those who argue that computer-mediated communication liberates interpersonal relations from the confines of physical locality and thus creates opportunities for new, but genuine, personal relationships and communities (e.g., Pool, 1983; Rheingold, 1993). One vision is of relationships lost, while the other is of relationships liberated and found. These conflicting visions are not, of course, unique to debates about computer-mediated communication. Instead they reflect long-running, historical debates about the nature of modernity and the social effects of changes in communication and transportation technology (Marvin, 1987; Wellman, 1979). More specific versions of these debates can be found in the literature on the effects of the reduction in communicative cues associated with computer-mediated communication. They are also reflected in the sharply differing applications of personal relationship theories to on-line settings. Most of the early research on computer-mediated communication involved laboratory studies in which small groups worked on structured problems for limited periods of time (Garton Siegal, Dubrovsky, Kiesler, Lea, O'Shea, Fung, Sproull Thompsen Prentice-Dunn Spears Zimbardo, 1969). These differences are most often explained by observing that social cues are filtered out in on-line settings (Culnan Kiesler, Siegal, Rice Short, Williams, Walther, Anderson, Walther Finholt Haythornthwaite, Wellman, McCormick Rice De Leon, 1994; Kanaley, 1995; Lewis, 1994; Wright, 1993), and a handful of scholarly reports on specific on-line communities (e.g., Brennan, Moore, Bruckman, 1992; Myers, 1987; Ogan, 1993; Reid, 1991; Wilkins, 1991). These accounts make it clear that on-line relationships are genuine personal relationships in the eyes of the participants. One person who played a MUD(2), for instance, commented that his on-line friendships were “much deeper and have better quality” than his real-life friendships (Bruckman, 1992, p. 23). Another person who had been active in a computer network for church workers said, “I know some of these people better than some of my oldest and best friends” (Wilkins, 1991, p. 56). In some cases, on-line relationships have blossomed into romance and marriage (Bruckman, 1992; Reid, 1991). These reports also illustrate how people overcome the technical limitations of CMC. In addition to the well-known use of keyboard characters, or “smileys,” to imitate facial expressions and paralinguistic features of conversation (e.g., typing “:-)” to indicate a smile), users frequently express emotion and metacommunicative intent by embedding words in text (Wilkins, 1991). The person who wishes a message to be taken as friendly teasing, for example, may embed a word or phrase like “grin” or “just kidding” in text. Another way people overcome the technical limitations of CMC is simply to supplement CMC with additional channels of communication. There are several reports of mail, telephone, and face-to-face contact as supplements to CMC (Ogan, 1993; Reid, 1991). In some cases, participants in on-line groups have organized social events so that they might meet in person (Bruckman, 1992; Rheingold, 1993). Popular attention has often fixated on the more manipulative and deceptive aspects of on-line relationships. Cases of gender switching (e.g., men pretending to be women) command particular attention (e.g., Bruckman, 1992; Van Gelder, 1985). CMC obviously provides rich opportunities for self-presentation and identity manipulation (Lea Myers, 1987). However, these opportunities also have a positive side. Cyberspace creates an “identity workshop” in which people learn and test social skills (Bruckman, 1992). Some participants, for example, report that their on-line identities allow them to overcome the shyness they feel in face-to-face interaction (Myers, 1987). People who are isolated or disabled can develop social relationships (Bock, 1994; Brennan et al., 1992; De Leon, 1994; Kanaley, 1995). Whereas the possibility of abuse always exists, CMC also provides ways for people to transcend the limitations they experience in face-to-face settings (Walther, 1995). Conflicting predictions regarding on-line relationships can also be obtained from theories of interpersonal communication and relationship development. The relative lack of social cues and the potential for feedback delays, for example, should lead both to higher uncertainty and more difficulty in reducing uncertainty about how to behave, how the partner will behave, and how to explain the partner's behavior. According to uncertainty reduction theory (Berger Parks Berger Huston Kelley, 1979; Kelley et al., 1983). Existing theories also underscore the importance of physical appearance and physical attraction, especially in the development of romantic relationships (e.g., Berscheid Kelley, 1979; Kelley et al., 1983). 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