“I’m Here, but at the Same Time I Am Not from Here”: Memorable Messages and Absences in First-Generation African Migrants’ Family Communication

Immigrants’ family members are crucial socialization agents for their children in the United States, yet the content of the familial messages and advice they give has not been systematically investigated. This study examines the impactful memorable messages that first-generation African immigrants report hearing about migration from their family members. Our findings show that, apart from the United States’ systemic othering of migrants, African immigrant family members themselves also deploy “conditional othering” language as a socialization tactic. Participants (children of immigrants) interpreted these exclusionary statements as framing the United States as a space for opportunity. Nonetheless, these framings also shape their experience of belonging. In addition to verbal memorable messages, participants also recalled memorable absences and non-verbal cues, moments where silence or omission itself carried meaning. We theorize these absences as powerful socialization techniques that inform African immigrants’ cultural adaptation.