Call me by my name! Constructing and acknowledging non-binary identities

Despite the growing visibility of gender-expansive identities, the construction of non-binary ones remains comparatively underexplored in social psychology. In particular, the dialogical dimension of identity work remains mostly unaddressed. Thus, this study investigates how non-binary individuals construct their identities in dialogue with present and imagined others. We conducted a discourse-oriented thematic analysis of accounts of 19 non-binary participants across 7 focus groups in Milan (Italy), identifying four interrelated themes. In the first – living within the binaries – non-binary participants described the ongoing struggle of living in a binary society where gender is reified through everyday interactions, institutional practices, and language. In the second – de-anchoring from the binaries – participants distanced themselves from cis-normative and trans-normative models, rejecting both the gender assigned at birth and the equation between bodily expression and gender identity. In the third – living in-between – non-binary identities are framed as a creative and empowering space of becoming, where gender identity is made processual and multiplied – thus promoting an alternative to binary representations of gender. In the fourth – call me by my name – participants reported facing a representational void and actively creating new meaning-making resources – gender-inclusive language, gender-neutral pronouns, and novel symbols – to make their identities visible and recognisable to others. Our findings show how non-binary identity is constructed not individually but relationally, making recognition an existential condition. Ultimately, we call on social psychology to attend to the dialogical and recognition-based dimensions of identity work for gender-expansive individuals.