Preferences and Polyamory: Investigating Ideal Mate Preferences for Concurrent Partners in Monogamous and Polyamorous Individuals

Although a large body of research has been devoted to investigating human mate preferences, much of this research focuses exclusively on monogamous relationships. While monogamy is a prevalent mating system, concurrent, non-monogamous mating has also been common both throughout human history and across the ethnographic record. Here, we seek to address this gap in the literature by exploring ideal preferences for two concurrent romantic partners among both monogamous and polyamorous participants. In Studies 1 and 2, using a budget allocation paradigm, we performed a k -Means cluster analysis to explore the types of ideal concurrent partners preferred by two largely monogamous samples of participants. In Study 3, we applied these same methods among a sample of polyamorous participants. Across all studies, the results revealed that a plurality of participants preferred two well-rounded partners, in which all traits were valued similarly. However, monogamous men were significantly more likely than monogamous women to prefer at least one partner for whom attractiveness and skill in bed were prioritized above all other traits. These findings only partially generalized to polyamorous participants, who also most often preferred two well-rounded partners, but did not exhibit gender differences in cluster assignment. In addition, we found that, across studies, partner preferences are likely influenced by intended investment between partners, suggesting that preferences are sensitive to the specific contexts and structures of these relationships. These findings emphasize the need for more research on the psychological systems involved in non-monogamous mating.