Reflections on Death among Aging Mothers of Adult Children with Serious Conditions

The expected trajectory of parent-child relationships—parents investing in children for decades before eventually requiring their support—can take different shape when children’s adult independence is constrained. Integrating the intergenerational stake hypothesis with the concept of generational maturity, this study explored one such case: how mothers of adult children with disabilities and other conditions requiring extensive care experienced and/or anticipated the later stages of their parenting journey. A thematic frame approach organized analyses of interview data from 72 mothers of adult children (82% whose children had serious conditions, mean age = 57). Mothers expressed grave concerns about their future deaths, focusing on who would care for their children, and tried to cope with their anxiety and guilt by concretely planning for their deaths and their children’s futures. Some worried that their children might die first, including what their own lives would look like absent this closely identified maternal role.