10 Hard Truths About Why Extramarital Affairs Are Rising in India — and What Actually Protects a Marriage

Infidelity in India has moved, in less than a decade, from a subject barely discussed in public to one debated in Parliament, litigated in the Supreme Court, and tracked by dating platforms built specifically to facilitate it. This article examines what has actually changed, and why, using verified data rather than anecdote: the 2018 Joseph Shine judgment that decriminalized adultery, the 2023 parliamentary recommendation to recriminalize it that was ultimately not adopted, survey data showing rising self-reported infidelity alongside India's persistently low divorce rate, and National Crime Records Bureau figures showing a genuine rise in the share of murders motivated by love affairs and illicit relationships. It then turns to the actual mechanics of how affairs develop, drawing on psychologist Shirley Glass's extensively documented “walls and windows” research, which shows that most affairs begin not as a single dramatic betrayal but as a slow, four-stage reversal of ordinary relationship boundaries — and on the research literature connecting early childhood attachment disruption to adult difficulty sustaining monogamous commitment. Sociological drivers specific to modern Indian life — long-distance careers, curated social media comparison, and near-unlimited digital opportunity — are examined alongside global comparative data showing India is not an outlier but part of a broader pattern research has documented across cultures. The article closes with a practical accounting of early warning signs worth taking seriously, an evidence-based look at what actually protects a marriage, a compassionate but honest look at repair after betrayal, and a final turn to how India's own classical tradition — through the Grihastha ashrama and the Saptapadi marriage vow of lifelong friendship — framed fidelity as a question of companionship long before it became a question of law.