Relational Infrastructure Under Hesitation: A Multi-Session Icebreaker Built Around Hesitation, Not Against It

Icebreakers typically assume that participation is available from the outset. In practice, early interactions are marked by hesitation, silence and uneven contribution, less a matter of willingness than of interpersonal conditions not yet being in place. This article presents a multi-session experiential activity designed around that reality. Rather than treating connection as the product of a single exercise, the activity builds relational infrastructure incrementally across the first four sessions of a course. Each session uses a low-cost nomination sequence with multiple modes of participation, spoken, chat or emoji, while group composition rotates to expand familiarity across the cohort. Grounded in self-determination theory and psychological safety research, the design lowers entry costs, stabilises expectations through repetition and decouples participation from speaking. The activity requires no materials, no prior preparation and 5 to 10 min per session, making it viable across face-to-face, online and hybrid formats.