How Can I Trust You Again? Repair Behaviours and Trust Recovery After Romantic Betrayal

Trust recovery after romantic betrayal is a central concern in couple therapy, yet little is known about which behaviours are most strongly associated with partners' perceived trust repair. We present the results of an online survey of betrayed partners who had attempted reconciliation after romantic infidelity (N = 263). Using hierarchical regressions, we tested for the effect of dispositional predictors (attachment anxiety, attachment avoidance, propensity to trust) and betrayed partners' perceptions of five post-betrayal repair behaviours (transparency, monitoring, remorse, explanation, reconnection) on trust recovery (i.e., differential of trust in the betraying partner now compared to after having discovered the infidelity). Repair behaviours explained substantially more variance in trust recovery than dispositions, which had, at best, rather indirect effects. More specifically, perceived remorse, reconnection, and explanation uniquely predicted trust recovery, whereas transparency and monitoring did not account for additional unique variance once other behaviours were included. These findings suggest trust repair is chiefly associated with what partners do, more than with stable predispositions.